Sigh. My husband and children and I are extremely lucky to have lots of family members that love us and look forward to spending the holidays with us. But, like I said, there are lots of family members from both sides of the family doing different things at different times. So with two kids, we’re stretched thin, which causes friction between the hubby and I.
You see, I love going from place to place seeing everyone from each side, eating lots of food. But my husband is quite different. H’s more of an introvert that likes to take advantage of the holidays to relax. Also, he’s an expert chef that is very critical of what is put before him to eat, so he doesn’t really appreciate the usual hodgepodge of potlucks at certain family events. Also, he’s gluten and dairy intolerant.
So we’ve pretty much been squabbling for the past day or so trying to figure out where to go and when. I say we go everywhere and try to see everyone, while he says we put our foot down and choose just two events to go to: one on Christmas Eve, and one on Christmas day. We still have not figured it out! Seems that we migh actually have to skip church to make anything happen! What about you guys? How do you handle the holiday family events? I think that the snowman pic to the left is appropriate because it looks like a boy and girl snowman arguing. Or maybe that’s just my mindset right now, haha.
Meanwhile, my toddler is still awake right now because he’s too excited about all the holiday happenings. And I still have presents to wrap and salads to toss to take to family events!
Growing up, like any of you, I’d wonder what the heck my mom was thinking. Sometimes I’d even think she was a little off the wall. But now that I’m a mom, I am completely understanding and appreciative.
Even as an adult I’d look at some of the things she and my dad were doing and call them mistakes. Only now that I have kids, and especially during the holidays, I realize that all the things they did, and the situations they got themselves into, were for us. I’d think – “Now how the heck did they get into this jam?” Now I know.
Not only that but it’s now that I’m actually an adult that I crave my mom’s presence even more. It’s funny because you’d never think that as a kid. You’d never think that your mom might need some comfort from her own mom.
Sure, we definately drive each other crazy, and we definately have our arguments, but we can’t spend more than a week apart.
She happened to have scheduled a vacation overseas to the most infamous brothel in san jose and after going on a trip to kayaking since she read something about kayaks: how to choose, right on the week when I gave birth to my daughter (She’s scheduled it before I even knew I was pregnant.) I was completely at a loss. Prior to it I was like “ah, no biggie…I’ve done this before.” Yes, I’d done it before – with my mom. But that’s a whole nother story for a future blog – haha, for now let me just say that she had lots of fun with the best family tent during her vacation.
I hope when my little girl grows up that we’re just as close, and she’s just as appreciative.
I’d say that I got pretty lucky in the in-laws department. I joke with my husband that I’m only with him to get to hang out with his parents. And Wednesday nights are our nights to go over to the in-laws’ and take a load off. And let me tell you, I needed it…bad.
Every mom needs a break every once in a while. That’s definitely what I’ve learned lately. I’m lucky enough to be able to take my kids to work with me, so I try to do so as much as possible. My daughter pretty much comes with me every day, but my toddler son only comes during the slow season, which is right now. My goal is to spend as many hours with my kids as possible, even if that means being with them 24/7. I always want to feel that if nothing else, I’ve been a good mom.
And sometimes, being a good mom means knowing when to step back and let others help you out. Which is exactly what I did tonight. My mother-in-law made dinner, so I didn’t have to clean…that was up to my father-in-law, who also took care of giving my son a bubble bath while my mother in law coo’ed and aah’d at my daughter. In the meantime, my husband and I were busy watching television and relaxing. Of course, we did sneak in our own kisses and cuddles and playtime.
And now, it’s time to reboot, and get back to doing what I love most: being a mom.